Too Sexy for This Pulpit

In a city with nearly 800 churches it shouldn't be this difficult to find a church home. SHOULD IT?

In the past five years, we've visited a ton of churches and even attempted to commit to a few.  But over and over again we're unsatisfied for some reason or another. We always end up leaving for greener pastures.  I won't get into all the particulars, but I can say I am grateful that there has always been a wide variety of churches to choose from around here.  Well, maybe I'm not always grateful, but quite often I'm not ungrateful.

Lately we've been attending a church that just might be our next "home." There is a lot to like about it and to be quite honest we're just sick of looking and ready to plant roots SOMEWHERE. Ringing endorsement, right? All I mean is it's time for us to stop being so picky and just settle in to worship and serve.  Enter the new church.

Wanna know something weird though? My biggest complaint is that the pastoral staff is too good looking. That's right; I think these guys are way too attractive.  Isn't there some sort of commandment about pastors? Something like, "Thou shall not be a pretty boy?"  It isn't that I'm crushing on them.  I don't find myself lusting after them as I listen to them teach.  It's quite the opposite actually.  For me, their looks are a huge turnoff. I have a really, really difficult time taking them seriously or trusting anything that they say.

Here's the thing, I have some baggage. Pretty boys set off my "BS" meter.  I just don't trust them.  Fool me once and all that jazz.  I've known a pretty boy or two in my day and almost without exception they are full of crap. They're willing to say whatever is necessary to get whatever they want. So, when I see a pretty boy standing behind a pulpit I have a major issue. It doesn't matter if they're preaching some straight up truth all I hear is "blah, blah, I'm so pretty, look into my eyes and fall under my "BS" spell."  So that's an issue, right?

Can you imagine listening to a sermon by a man that looks like THIS?!?