3.07.2009

since u been gone

i had a few itunes dollars leftover from christmas and decided to blow them today. with nothing in particular out there that i NEEDED to have, i was just surfing around for something new. i stumbled onto the new kelly clarkson single and it got me thinking. one of my favorite genres of music used to be angry chick break-up music. now, thanks to my handsome husband i never find myself tearfully searching through the ipod for kelly's breakaway, michelle brach's hotel paper or anything by fiona apple. at this point it is an absolutely ignored chunk of music in my very diverse ipod.

back in the day, i was heart deep in relationship drama on a regular basis. roller coaster relationships were my specialty. the cycle of blissful happiness, crushing heartbreak, self medicated indifference and doomed reconciliation typically came full circle almost weekly. as you can imagine, there were lots of opportunities for singing along to angry chick break-up music at the top of my lungs. can't you just picture me? i was full of angst and really wallowing in it. kelly, michelle and fiona were my go to girls. they understood. they perfectly articulated my pathos.

my how things have changed. now it's more likely that i'm listening to jason mraz's i'm yours than michelle branch's 'til i get over you. after all, nothing obliterates the need for angry chick break-up music like a functioning relationship coupled with a lifetime commitment. and today i'm realizing something. the one downside to my currently stable relationship is the absence of impassioned singalongs with my girls. so, i've decided to try to incorporate a little angry chick break-up music back into my repertoire. sure the emotion won't be genuine. i won't be as raw. but the drama queen still lives deep within me and she deserves to come out and sing every once in awhile.

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